it hurts more in the daytime
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
