Where did you get a picture of my penis
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
nutella sex= disaster
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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