thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
