It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Randomize