please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize