Need sex. Gaining weight.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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