I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
