had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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