You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize