I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
