I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
40s are totally the cure
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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