All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
her facebook's as public as her vagina
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Randomize
