glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize