Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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