I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
