sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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