I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Quick, to the slutcave!
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
