Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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