just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
