So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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