I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
