what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
