Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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