Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
