These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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