What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
