i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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