this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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