So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
