lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
