He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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