But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
