I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
