oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
