I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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