I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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