her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
