Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
