Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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