Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize