My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
