this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
