if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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