There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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