actually, I'm a sock model
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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