we have officially lost it.
I'm jealous of your bromance
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
