i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Houston, we have a blender
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
