The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
