I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
