matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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